In my bed Saturday night I was feeling regret that I had let another day go by without having spent my "quality" time being alone and quiet with God. As I meditated on it I tried to decide if I was just being hard on myself, or if I'd really blown it!
I can be too hard on myself.
I decided that I had sought to follow Him through the last few days, and that it wasn't wrong to be busy, necessarily. I just missed being with the One who gives me each breath and each heartbeat, and maybe He "felt" the same way!
Crawling out of my warm bed, I snuggled next to the heater with my Bible. I opened to the book of Job for the third time that week. It's not my favorite spot in the Bible, but I read with an open mind and jotted some notes down in my journal.
As I quieted my thoughts and started to get sleepy, I believe that I heard Him say that I would receive a promise. Now, I tell you, if I'd heard that ten years ago, I would have instantly hoped He was going to give us another child! Well, my desires have sure changed!
My anticipation started to take off as my mind began making a list of what I'd like that promise to be: finances, healing, or perhaps, success in my work? I went to sleep wondering...
I wasn't thinking about the promise when we were in church the next day, till we were in the middle of singing the Nicole C. Mullen song, "I Know My Redeemer Lives". I about choked - and tears came to my eyes! That was the very scripture that I'd written in my journal the night before! It was definitely confirmation to me that I was hearing the promised promise!
Think about it! What is a better promise than my Redeemer living and standing on the last day? What is more awesome than seeing God? And here all I thought would be great would be to have a bucket of rocks! That's all that finances are anyway, right?
As I quoted the scripture to myself, three little words hit home for me: "in my flesh". That's even MORE amazing! In my flesh I will see God!
He made my flesh. He's my Redeemer. He's my Defender. In my flesh I will see Him! Seeing Him will take care of everything else that concerns me.
It's just too much!
"I know that my Redeemer (also translated as Defender) lives
and that in the end He will stand upon the earth.
And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh
I WILL SEE GOD; I myself will see Him with my own eyes-I, and not another.
How my heart yearns within me!" Job 19:25-27 NIV
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