Hearing Heart Blog

My dear husband gathered up his notebook and pen, cell phone and glasses this morning, and off he went to his orientation at Lane Community College. Remembering my motherly musings about being an older student on campus and enjoying it, I watched him get in his truck and drive off. I had my turn three years ago when I stepped out to learn something new. I chose my top two favorite classes in the entire course catalog, and decided that if I only had ONE term of school, these would be the most valuable to me: Microsoft Word and Computer Fundamentals. Both of these fed my hunger and love for words and seemed an easy beginning for me. My self-confidence was lagging a little bit, so "easy" was important to me. From that point I grew to where I am now working in my dream job at home from on my computer. Now it's his turn. His daughter-in-law joked with him last night that he needed a lunch pail, and we reminisced about the tin lunch pails of the 60s when we were in elementar

Tears of frustration—is that what happens when the internet is down? My goodness, how did I become so attached that I would feel this way when it’s not available to me? Part of the problem was that I was functioning in the personal fear that I was to blame, that I’m not smart enough to figure out how to fix it. Too many steps and things to try, it was all terribly overwhelming for me. I spent most of the morning yesterday troubleshooting, going through the steps I’d learned in my courses at LCC. Finally, I had unhooked and rehooked the modem and router so many times that I was afraid I’d tear the cord apart in my distress. When I identified the fact I was getting angry I shut everything down. I knew my work was not going to get done that day. I’m rather embarrassed by it now, but I went through a progression of worries like “what if” terrorists controlled internet service and shut the whole country down? “What if” I couldn’t work any longer? “What if ” my house slid down the hil

Just thought I'd share a multi-generational family moment. Here's a picture with my parents, husband, son, daughter-in-law, daughter, friend, and grandchildren all cooling off by the river at Harrisburg, OR. It was a rare occasion when we all could come together with just 2 hours' notice. A sweet, relaxing time. I've been 100% guilty of neglecting family time. I am mending my ways now, and putting other things aside to be with them more. You're welcome to join us; just give me a call next time the temperatures go above 90 degrees. Let's go get our feet wet! qoqoqoqoqoqoqoqoqo

Thwack! The old lady's cane came down hard on the top of the pew 2 rows ahead of her. She was aiming for an older gentleman's head, believe it or not! I didn't see it, but I was told her first shot had hit home. Evangelist Tim was well into his sermon and was struggling to stay on track while Mr. Wayne, the older gentleman, repeatedly turned to converse with the boy next to him on the front row. Apparently Mr. Wayne was distracting more than just the speaker, and this lady took it upon herself to reprimand him! Thwack! I had found Mr. Wayne a delight to converse with before the service started. So many interesting stories you can hear from a 94-year-old; driving a model T when he was 9 years old, outliving three wives. I guess he just had more to say. As I leaned discreetly to view the goings on, my mouth dropped open. Pastor Fred was sliding into the pew next to Mr. Wayne with his finger on his lips "shushing" the older saint. It just never occurred to me tha

He was on to me. He knew this grandma would try to get him interested in an adventure that he might not like, not at first anyway. But we went out the door into the west Texas heat and played on our chalk drawings in the driveway. He needed to work on his hop-scotch proficiency and I was recruited to improve the tracing of his silhouette with a cape and power-charged boots so it would look more like Iron Man. Then we looked around for something else to do. I decided to lead him across the street to satisfy my curiosity about an empty house that had been cleaned up the day before. (That old nesting instinct hasn't died off in me yet!) We didn't intrude, but I noticed further down the dead-end street some trees that appeared to be a park. I coaxed him along "just a little farther" until we came to a ditch that he recognized as a place where he and his dad had looked for a geocache* treasure. We agreed that the area appeared a bit spooky so we turned back. "

In the raucous of bowling balls pounding the floor and pins tumbling and crashing I enjoyed some quiet moments in my head tonight. Aaron and Sarah were enjoying their games and their friends, and Ayden was occupied with the business of getting his ball down the lane and watching the score. That allowed me to crawl into my mind for some thinking time. 1. Tomorrow is my last full day in San Angelo and I don't know when I'll see my son and his family again. 2. Aaron & Sarah are feeling a sense of loss with the eminent departure of several of their friends who are heading out to new assignments (military). We're all rather somber tonight. 3. I'm looking forward to getting back into my strength training, my work and worship ministry. 4. There are lifestyle changes awaiting me at home that could be overwhelming, almost as much as when I was preparing for my wedding 35 years ago - the most serious lifestyle change! It seems remarkable, but with all of this there is

Yesterday we scooted along in the Honda for about 2 hours to Sonora, Texas. As a child I had visited Carlsbad Caverns in southern New Mexico and thought it might be a fun trip for my Texas family, but Aaron found information on the Caverns of Sonora which was much closer! After the tour we spent good money for three bags of dirt to strain in the sluice box like we were panning for gold. Sure enough, we found numerous bits of gemstones and pretty rocks. In the gift shop my son and I resisted the impulse to buy a rock for for his grandfather. What kind of rock do you buy for a guy who has just about one of everything already? wmwmwmwmwmwmwmwmwmwm

My son, his wife, and my grandson took me on a walking tour of downtown San Angelo to show me some storefronts and historical buildings today. I'm such a wimp in the heat, but since it's just part of life in west Texas I embraced the challenge. Sarah found some nice things at a couple boutiques, Aaron enjoyed watching her, and Ayden and I looked into some kaleidoscopes and chiming clocks. Most of the places where we stopped were filled with fine glass, ceramics and other breakables, so more reserved behavior was called for. But one of our last stops was at a re-sale shop with a more relaxed environment. At one point the proprietor even egged me on with some teasing. After a quick look-around I was pretty well convinced I wouldn't find anything I needed to buy, so Ayden and I played a low-key game of hide and seek around the racks. Then the music from the radio started affecting my feet. Was it dancing? YUP! I took a few steps here and there, and then pretty soon Ayd

Ayden and I hung around home today, so before the heat set in we made our own world with sidewalk chalk in the driveway. It's fascinating to enter into boys' play. 1. The first thing we created was a road. What guy would be happy without a way to go places? 2. The second thing of importance was a WalMart store, probably for buying more Iron Man toys, I'd guess. 3. Then we decided Iron Man needed a home, so Ayden made the city of Dallas at the end of the driveway and I drew a garage for his motorcycle to park in. 4. I suggested a gas station, but it was most likely a "girl thing" to think that a motorcycle could run out of gas. Don't bother him with such details! 5. At that point he was losing interest in my drawing. Drawing is my thing, not his, so in order to re-engage him I asked him to lay down on the ground so I could trace him and make a giant for Iron Man to fight. Then I lay down and we made a scary grandma giant. I haven't quite figured out how a

Being a little sleep deprived did not help with my anxiety about navigating San Angelo for the first time this morning. The sun was threatening to pass 100 degrees by mid afternoon, so there was anxiety about the heat. Add to that my anxiety about driving someone else's car for the first time with someone else's child in tow. A little praying and a little singing--then I felt better. We gotta go now or I'll chicken out as it gets hotter, I thought. Though the GPS unit had been demonstrated and well explained, I needed the comfort of finding a map and seeing the layout in my head myself. I can't handle too many new things at once. Don't tell me to head east, tell me the name of the road to watch for. Don't give me a list, draw me a picture. That's just how it works best for my brain. I found a Google map and charted my course. Once on the road I thought at one point I might be leaving town and heading for Christoval. Deep concentration brought me t

I ran through the sprinkler with my grandson today, and I haven’t done that in Texas in 50 years! I don’t know what this neighborhood thinks of me, but I hope they see how much fun people can have if they take a little time to play with a child! Ayden’s San Angelo parents and I enjoyed another sweet bonding time till rather late last night, so I got up too late this morning for Plan A: get a jog before they leave for work. Consequently, I kicked into Plan B: work out/play with Ayden. He played in the sprinkler alone for awhile as I jogged up and down the street in front of his house. Then I joined him! I slipped my swimsuit and my skirt covering on and had a blast teaching him how to gargle, not get it up his nose, not spit it out on grandma, and manipulate the spray with the airplane pose. We observed how only one side of the tree was getting wet, while at the same time we were totally soaked! I sloshed indoors to get some towels and my camera and we played for another half hou

I dug my apron out of my luggage this morning and went to work pushing counter-top appliances around to wipe and scrub. I guess I feel enough a part of this new family that I can start helping tidy up. I don't know how to describe the simple pleasure of washing the dishes. Being here with my son's family has made me reminisce about my "younger mother" days. I wore the badge of HOMEMAKER proudly, because to me it meant that my husband and I were in agreement that this was the best investment we could make together. We supported each other, and it was all for love. "You shall love the Lord your God...love your neighbor as yourself." So I washed the plates, swept the floor, managed the garbage, did some laundry and played Mario Brothers and Wii games with Ayden. Some of these things are not my most favorite activities, but love causes me to live outside of self. That is my joy. uouououououououououo

My grandson borrowed his Dad’s “O” (U of O) hat and he was ready to go. But his Oregon grandma required a little more time than that in order to fill the backpack with water bottles, sunscreen, a trail mix bar, cell phone, handkerchief, camera, lip balm and coin purse. My wide-brimmed hat was planted on my head, chin strap cinched down, sandals buckled. Ayden wasn’t sure he appreciated the idea of having to walk to the park today, and I was a little concerned myself. He preferred riding in the car, but today there was no car available. And it is out of my comfort zone to explore a neighborhood I’m not familiar with when the temperature is due to reach 100°. Definitely out of my comfort zone! But this day was a “new beginning” day, my first day in San Angelo with 7-year-old Ayden. When we headed down the road it didn’t take long for me to become swarmed with memories of my childhood in El Paso. I’d forgotten about the heat and the days spent in our tiny plastic pool, and everyo